Monday, September 16, 2013

I Got Arrested

Holy Shit! Talk about a duality polar opposite day!!! I don't celebrate Holidays anymore... I got my moles removed on Mother's Day and check out what happened on Labor Day, my day off... 

Lets start on yesterday's note shall we.... 

Yesterday, I happened to be reading a book that my dear sister brought my way when I was in desire of new reading material. The name “Healing Love through the Tao... Cultivating Female Sexual Energy”... I am a healer and I had been wondering about healing through sex... its great exercise, it opens Chakras... I have heard that one can Astral Travel upon Orgasm together with your partner. WOW!!! Who wouldn't want to reach that ecstasy? … 

Anyway, Jay, a friend at the harbor swung by to return a book he had taken out of the book donation box at our booth. Finishing a thick one in no time at all... I had recognized that intelligent being in Jay that shares qualities of that husband of mine... I like a man with a high IQ... Jay tossed the book on my booth suggesting maybe I have this as my next book to check out recommending, “Not bad, not great, interesting, but disappointing, I thought it would have more facts about the actual murders.”... (I guess the book was a true story about some scandalous murder?)... 

I decline the offer, “I'm good Jay, I have a book that has landed in my hands”... and with that, I whip out that book I am reading. 

Jay immediately takes the book from me to check it out with a smile on his face. He was amused by his findings that speak of an egg and a woman's vagina. Right at this moment, I get customers that come up having Jay respectfully step out of the way, book in hand; stepping over to the booth on the left of me where Lisa happens to be hanging out... Folks, let me fill you in on Ms Lisa...Lisa is a great sistah friend of mine at the harbor. Lisa is the one that used to work my job for 9 years. While I was employed with Mark Robinson in slip #8, Lisa was Parasail girl slip #15... Lisa is brutally honest which I adore. Lisa can hang with the toughest truckers you can find; she is a bad ass... With that said, allow me to continue... 

Jay steps over to “No Problem's” booth, speaking out loud of his findings where Lisa is sprawled out comfortably. 

After finishing up with my customers, I hear Lisa, “Jay, I do not want to discuss my vagina with you, go back over to Keri's booth and talk about her vagina with her, it’s her freakin book!” 

Hearing this, finding myself very amused, I holler out to Lisa, “Lisa I love you, this is so entertaining for me. Is Jay making you uncomfortable?” 

Right before hastily exiting the booth to remove herself from this situation, Lisa spurts, “I'm not uncomfortable. Why the Fuck would I want to discuss my vagina with Jay!” 

Jay then moseys on over returning my book, informing me that I need to be purchasing me an egg for the future chapters. 

Folks, this scene has played over and over in my head, leaving me with perma giggles all night long
bringing an amazing ab workout and joyous release of tears, no joke, nonstop even drifting off to sleep with giggles. It has fueled me with high vibration and has most definitely been my happy thought, lol. Literally. 

Anyways, along giggling to my repetitive thoughts, I was checking out Madonna's new Cd, MDNA. I have recently connected the powerful manifesting that her last album “Confessions on a Dance Floor” has brought into my life. I had played it over and over in 2006 adding thoughts of desires and wants into my vortex while dancing to this powerful Cd, not realizing that the amazing Madonna is taking me on an amazing journey that was to come. 

Currently seeing the manifestation of “Confessions on a Dance Floor” in my life; listening to each song with the understanding of the journey; applying it to my life; helping me understand the cycle she is singing about AND in the order she sings it!!! 

Hung Up... time goes by so slowly...I'm tired of waiting for you
Get Together... there's too much confusion its all an illusion... do you believe in love at first sight  (ending with a whispered, “if its bitter at the start, then its sweeter in the end”)
Sorry... I've heard it all before I don't wanna hear... please don't say you're sorry
Future Lovers... I'm gonna tell you about love, lets forget your life, forget your problems... let me be  your guide, put aside your pride, future lovers hide, love inside their eyes
I Love New York... I don't like cities, but I like New York. Other places make me feel like a dork, Los  Angeles is for people who sleep... if you don't like my attitude, then you can F off. Just go to  Texas, isn't that where they golf... if you can’t stand the heat, then get off my street.
Let It Will Be... now let me tell you about success, about fame...don't it make you smile, let it will be,  just let it be
Forbidden Love...Just one kiss on my lips was all it took to seal the future, just one look from your  eyes was like a certain kind of torture. Once upon a time there was a boy there was a girl. Just  one touch from your hands was all it took to make me falter. Forbidden Love... are we supposed  to be together...
Jump... there's only so much you can learn in one place. The more that I wait, the more time that I  waste.  I haven't got much time to waste. Its time to make my way. I'm not afraid of what I'll  face, but I'm afraid to stay. I'm going down my road and I can make it alone. I’ll work and I’ll  fight till I find a place of my own... are you ready to jump, get ready to jump, don't ever look  back, just take my hand get ready to jump.
How High... How high are the stakes. How much fortune can you make. Does this get any better.   Should I carry on will it matter when I'm gone will any of this matter... its funny, how  everybody mentions my name but they're never really nice. I took it, just about everything,  except my own advice.
Isaac... wrestle with your darkness, angels call your name, can you hear what they are saying, will you  ever be the same... remember, remember never forget, all of your life has been a test, you will  find the gate that's open, even though your spirit's broken,. Open up my heart, cause my lips to  speak, bring the heavens and the stars down to earth for me.
Push... you push me to go the extra mile. When its difficult to smile, you push me. A better version of  myself, you push me only you and no one else...you see the other point of view... when I think I  know it all you push me when I stumble and I fall...only you and only you and only you... to see  the other point of view when there's nothing else to do when I think I know it all, only you and  only you and only you
Like It or Not...You can call me a sinner, you can call me a saint. Celebrate me for who I am dislike  me for what I ain't. Put me on a pedestal or drag me down in the dirt. Sticks and stones will
 break my bones but your names will never hurt. Ill be the garden, you be the snake. All of my  fruit is  yours to take better the devil that you know, your love for me will grow because, this is  who I am, you can like it or not, you can love me or leave me cus im never gonna stop...
 

WOW!!! Right? I am so living the last of the CD 

I want to know what is next! 

Girl Gone Wild... song number one for the next journey! 

Upon first hearing it, I had to have it! This new song of Madonnas was one of my first new songs I downloaded at the time of my arrival on Maui. 

Knowing that I am on my way to the next “Station”. Having a strong desire to know the rest of the ride, I get familiar with the next song on the album, “Gang Bang”... It has great beats! I love her voice, I love everything about it. Not fully understanding the message of what is to come, or how this pertains to my journey, just rocking out to it; loving jiving to it a few times before going to bed. 

Gang Bang... like a bitch out of order, like a bat out of hell like a fish out of water, I'm scared cant you  tell... bang bang, ... I thought it was you and I loved you the most but I was just keeping my  enemies close. I made a decision I would never look back... Bang bang, shot you dead bang  bang, shot you dead... I thought it was you and I loved you the most but I was just keeping my  enemies close. I made a decision; I would never look back … bang bang shot you dead  shot  my lover in the head. 

(Let me fill you in... besides really digging Madonna's deliverance of the beats with attitude, I connected hugely... for those of you that haven't heard... In the end, I had stabbed my husband three times with my favorite Cutco scissors and choked him out with a crow bar with cops arriving to haul my husband of 23 years off to jail, right before I moved to Maui) 

I wake up this morning with a strong desire to go find a MADONNA MDNA CD ASAP!!! After waking and baking, I head over to the other side blaring “Confessions” rocking out with full understanding excited to obtain MDNA. 

In my blissful state of elation, I miss my turn to Wal-mart. Oh wells, I will just go to the mall. Of course, they should have a Cd store in the mall. 

On the way to the mall I remember that I needed to go to Green Lotus and pick up some business cards. I am drawing out maps on a daily basis. I get asked where I got my amazing pendant every day I work. 

Upon entering the store, the lady is on the phone going on and on how business hasn't been great in the past but it has mysteriously been busy today as if business will be picking up. 

I had originally planned on just running in getting the cards and then running out. With her preoccupation on the phone, I took that as a sign that there is something that I need to get. I slowly browse the store waiting for her to finish her call. 

After browsing for 20 minutes, I set eyes on these small egg shape stones. Bringing me to laughter instantly; I have to check them out... There were five different little eggs; they each only cost $3. I
instinctively pick up the egg on the end. As soon as I do, the lady gets off of the phone. I take that as my cue that I have the chosen one and proceed to the counter. I get the business cards and pay for the egg. 

I ask her, “What stone is this made from?” 

“Jasper, let me look up the meaning for you.” 

Jasper-The ancient Egyptians wore Jasper scarabs as amulets as the stone was believed to increase sexual energy. According to the Bible, Jasper was a direct gift from God and would be the first foundation stone of the New Jerusalem. Also, both Indians in Asia as well as Native Americans see Jasper as a magical rain stone and also a powerful healing stone. 

Upon her reading it, I ask, “Do you have time for a really funny story?” 

I shared with her the Lisa and Jay story splitting my gut with laughter while telling it. We had a great laugh and had fun with the amazing connection of it all. 

I leave Green Lotus and head to the mall. Upon entering the mall, I hear entertainment going on center stage. I make my way over and see with delight that the keiki (children) are performing their Hawaiian dances. I LOVE this culture. They are dancing to live beautiful fun Hawaiian music. 

I am a sucker for performances. Especially of children, I am a Mother. I am also an excellent audience member. I am one who appreciates talent, art, bravery, etc... all that it takes to perform and I am not shy in showing it. I'm standing near the front enjoying the show to the fullest... first the girls with props and singing... then the cutest little boys (3-6 yrs of age) in long board shorts, no shirt and a string of Kukui Nut Lei's. These little men were beyond a delight, how they owned the stage with their confidence, style and manhood with their Hawaiian dance with the greatest hip moves that brought claps and laughs galore. Following the boyz performance, were the beautiful young women that danced so gracefully to such a beautiful Hawaiian song with words I do not speak; bringing me to tears before the end. I excuse myself proudly showing my tears with gratitude for such a great moving performance. 

I continue on to the information sign to try to find the media store that will have my CD and find... one does not exist... Wow, I am on an island... I will head to Walmart. 

Still touched by the performance shedding tears of joy and love for those girls that are my daughter's age, my daughter rings in on my phone... of course she would get the feeling to give me a call so divinely perfect at this time. I answer with full love in my heart for my daughter, answering with love affirmations telling Kirah how amazing I think she is and telling her how proud I am of her. 

“Are you crying?” Kirah asks annoyed. 

“Yes, I am crying, but they are tears of joy and love for you.” and I continued to tell her about the wonderful performance I just left. 

Kirah, being uncomfortable with emotion says, “You’re weird, I'm gonna go” 

I again tell her I love her and hang up. 

As soon as I hang up, I am to the light where you turn for Walmart. Not thinking, I did a total Haole Mainland move... I impatiently move over to the lane that is not an added turn lane and see that a cop has parked himself in that spot just to catch people like me not thinking. 

Oh shit, but o'wells, send him love, it’s been a year since I have had to deal with those men in blue. 
I hurry for the turn as smooth and quick as possible, hoping to slip by unnoticed and get to a parking spot so that he cannot pull me over... 

I get to my parking spot... first one available upon entering the lot; you know right there where everyone is pulling in and pulling out... the intersection of entering Walmart parking. 

Seconds before I slam the gear shift in park, I hear the siren! 

WTF ever, hang on for the ride and see where this takes me. I instinctively reach for the glove box... silly me; I have been pulled over many times or more and am so trained to get registration and insurance papers... 

GET YOUR HANDS ON THE STEERING WHEEL” I hear in a tone of panic stricken fear from the officer approaching from the passenger panel behind me. 

Oh my, WOW, this guy is scared that little ole me is going to blow his brains out... “It’s okay, you have no need to fear” I softly, kindly speak to him as if I am talking to my little ones; gently bringing one hand off the steering wheel in a motion of surrender, “it’s okay, I'm not going to hurt you”... speaking similar things with my gentle soft gesture.... which just amped him up in more fear having him scream even louder and freaking out, GET YOUR HANDS ON THE STEERING WHEEL. 

Oh my heck, this guy is tripping. 

The very next thing he freaks out before even getting to my rolled down window, “I SMELL MARIJUANA, HAVE YOU BEEN SMOKING DO YOU HAVE MARIJUANA  IN THE CAR?” 

Softly, innocently chuckling to myself, I gently reply, “No, I have just came from the mall and witnessed a beautiful performance which has brought me to a bit of a cry, I don't know why you would smell Marijuana, I have not altered my state while being in this car today.” 

This officer continued to get all razzed like a K9 about some scent that he is assuming is flowing heavily out of my car. Not once even telling me why he has pulled me over. 

I'm starting to get a little nervous because of his actions treating me like a hard core criminal when all I wanted was my new Madonna CD, are you serious. Finally I tell him, “Dude your tripping, and if you need to search the car to help you feel better, go right ahead, do what needs to be done so I can get on my way, I have nothing to hide from you” 

Immediately back up is called, I am asked to get out of the car, ordered to sign papers stating that I am allowing them to search the car, search me and search all of my belongings. During all of this, the officers are asking questions left and right as if I am Nancy off of Weeds smuggling in pounds of weed from the border... finally the officer that was called for backup, asks, "Do you have kids that could have had the car and do they smoke?"...
 
Well, folks, I am an honest person, and if you ask me a question, I don't care who you are, you get my honest answer... I state, “Well actually yes and let me tell you something, my son has Tourettes and we have tried those legally prescribed prescriptions and they don't help as much as Marijuana so yes my boys smoke weed and I pray you don't follow me home arresting me, them and pursue any kind of take my kids away!”... 

The officer asks if I would like to sit in the shade. 
 
Totally aware of their hot dark suits they are sporting, I quickly decline on the offer stating, “No thank you, I love the sun, I love the heat, I work in the Lahaina Harbor and I am very good in the sun.” I loved my confidence, my power of my truth and loving my lack of fear for the men in blue. I am not easily intimidated and I am one that is used to being a spectacle and being on stage, so let’s do this thing for all to see... and that is the attitude rocking in my brain... bang bang.
 
Upon reading the papers and realizing I have a minute amount of weed in my wallet for those occasions... I calmly get a little nervous but play it off and say, “You know what, I am sick of playing this game, I have decided, I just want my Cd and I don't think I want to allow you to search all of me and my shit, this is turning into such a headache and I am feeling violated for doing absolutely nothing, I've had a beautiful day, a bit of a cry and just wanted my freakin Madonna Cd, so if you could site me for whatever the fuck it is that you even pulled me over for and maybe write me up for not having those registration and insurance papers that I could not find for you out of the glove box, I will bring them to court because I know I will be able to find them at home.” 

I then was informed that if I do not consent to this search, I will be detained, car will be impounded, and I will be taken into custody... 

“So is what I am hearing, is that there is no choice, really... either I can voluntarily allow you to violate my space, or I will be forced to and it will be more unpleasant in the end... hmmm... well this sounds like that adoption game that I played when I was 16 years old and voluntarily signed my first born away to adoption”... Yes, I did say this out loud. 

After hearing my point blank honest answer, the backup officer gets soft, still supporting his Haole left brained mother fucker co worker that has proceeded to give me papers to sign to “allow” the officers to violate my space. The backup officer, realizing that I may have some personal weed on me, whispers to me while the cop gets new papers for me to sign, (I had scribbled out the other one) “You are in Maui, Marijuana is no big deal” 

Hearing his message, I buck up and hang on for this ride to see where it is going to take me. 

I sign the papers.  

The men in blue proceed to search my car thoroughly with me pacing comfortably watching them as a mother does with her children who are trying to find something that she knows isn't there, the only words not spoken, “cold, colder, colder” 

I was extremely helpful, treating them like silly children that are trying their best to find fault. They ask, about the broken trunk that can only be accessed from the back seat. Which I gladly show them like the infamous Vannah White showing a letter, stating, “My car is pretty beat up, I'm just a single mother and my son has Tourettes, remember.” not that my son broke the trunk but yes, capitalizing every where I could, being totally aware and present in the Now to win this game.

They proceed to the windows trying to roll them up finding two busted out... “Remember, my son has Tourettes? Those windows are busted out”. ... bang bang... singing in my head. 

Time for my personal belongings to be searched; The officers open my purse and start their snooping with that Haole officer having new fear, “You don't have any needles in here that I will poke myself with?” 

“No darling, you really need to work on all that fear you have in your space. But I will tell you what you will find”... bang bang... “in this wallet, I have medicine in that prescription bottle, so I guess you get what you wanted so now what” … bang bang 

Well, now they need a woman cop to come frisk me and grope me so that "I feel more comfortable with it"... whatever... bang bang... just hold on for this ride it will soon be over... bang bang

Tita comes on the scene ready for groping... I lift my arms up and out sensually and spread my legs apart ready for wherever she wants to touch me; being ever so grateful for living in Maui for this past year to get me ok with myself and having the year to get accustomed with the Hawaii culture of love and aloha with hugs and kisses on the cheek and mouth... something that took me the full year to get used to; coming from a place where I was a Rapunzel in a castle not used to hugging even my cousin because of the insecurities my husband held. And seriously, no joke, those that know me know... yes I stated all that out loud to the three officers with love and humility but yet with an edge of Madonna sensuality... bang bang

Tita didn't like it and got a little gruff with me. But those boys were speechless as she roughly guided me to the hood of the car to bend me over with my hands on the hood like all those sexy music videos I have seen many times... bang bang... smiling sexy at those men in blue keeping contact with their eyes that are hidden behind their lenses during the whole spread em and groping for all customers to witness at Walmart was quite a site, a scene that I do get thrills on... bang bang

They continue to hand cuff me and yes I am in shock but keeping my cool for them to see. They roughly grab my elbow and roughly haul me to the back seat of the cruiser, shoving me in my seat belt, ordering me to sit back... for those of you that know me, I am a very graceful, light footed fairy like loving caring person that is extremely obedient which I proceeded to inform them, in a soft loving motherly voice, “I am being cooperative, I will walk this way gladly, no need to be so rough... I am very obedient, even so much that I lost my first born to adoption... well, I guess I am not a hundred percent obedient after all, I guess I did have sex before marriage which wasn't so obedient, ya I guess I am a criminal..” killing them with kindness with my sarcastic realistic humor. 

Driving over to the jail as a prisoner, I could not help but to think of that dear husband of mine and that night... bang bang... I had often wondered what it was like for him. I hated having to call the cops on him... I sat humbly and confidently holding good posture, holding eye contact (through officer K PYLAND's sunglasses) through the rear view mirror with a sensual loving smile directed toward him the entire time, only leaving the sunglasses to look directly at him personally; reading him, reading me, reading the situation fully aware and present in this NOW.

Officer K PYLAND starts texting while driving. I confidently kindly state, “I thought texting and driving were illegal.”... bang bang... 

“Not for us officers, it is part of our job and how we communicate.” 

“Oh, I see”

Proceeding on to the jail, Officer K PYLAND races up through the intersection hitting it 60 miles an hour... obviously very uncomfortable with his prisoner... “Wow, you officers get to break all of the rules” 

“I'm sorry, what?” 

“Speeding through an intersection... texting... wow, I never do that” 

Officer K PYLAND decides to turn up the radio... even better... I love music and totally have a testimony that music speaks to the soul and those angels and universe always sends the right tune... bang bang... 

The song that is playing that I instantly start dancing to because that is how I am... a song I have surprisingly never heard before... a song that sounded like the Ting Tings, total punk flavor... lyrics... “You need to work on making a girl smile”... I bust out with a soft laugh and say, “this is good music for you to be listening to, I pray that you continue to listen to such uplifting music to help you on your journeys.” while dancing and singing and jamming sensually to the tune... bang bang.... 

Shortly thereafter, we enter the bat cave so that the officer can unload this criminal without inflicting harm to the public. I get the same rough grabbing treatment. Again stating calmly and softly as a kind good mother does, “You have no need to fear me, I am cooperating, you don't have to be so rough, I won’t hurt you and I am very obedient, it’s ok, you’re ok” 

We get to Sarge and the local boyz. It was choice seeing the looks on those fellas faces seeing what purple haired drug addicted hard core menace to society criminal, Officer K PYLAND has brought in.
 
I get taken to a room for the paper work. Officer K is fumbling to get my cuffs off, in front of his Sarge while I am standing still as glass confident with excellent posture and no fear, while he is starting to dig the cuffs in my bony little wrists. I gently state in that motherly soft voice that I have gotten so good at, “you are hurting me”... Officer K softens his grip and gets the first cuff off, swinging himself in front of me to his knees to proceed with unlocking the second; ironically taking the position of some engagement proposal... gazing at him with love and kindness keeping my solid stance, he continues to fumble trying to unlock the key inflicting pain on me once again, and me once again kindly stating, “you are hurting me” while keeping my wrist outstretched to him standing still as glass. 

Keep in mind Sarge and the boyz are all watching with hot interest. 

Officer K continues handcuffing me to a chair as soon as freedom hits... a little taken back and shocked, I state, “Really, you guys are that fearful of me, this has been the craziest day of my life. Lots of love to you all. I cannot imagine living in such fear on a daily basis. So glad to be me and not you, I will gladly be in handcuffs today.” 

Next comes the questioning... well let me tell you about the questioning... God bless my dear sister Pati who has shared with me her experience when babies daddy called the cops on her because she was trying to take her kids back from him because he was not returning them to her. My dear sister Pati was in lock down in the insane asylum because she did not keep her cool well enough and those questions that they ask to trick you into I don't know what but somehow “proving” you are mentally insane and need lock down.... I also have under my awareness, of many stories from the past of Mother's of Loss answering those same questions and getting locked up and getting shock treatment... Cops... looking for the insane, creating it, praying on weak innocence such as Mothers vulnerability of loving her children like the lionesses that we are.

The questioning starts first starting with the easy ones... with me answering as delightful and sweet as I always do with customers all day long. 

“So your last name Stone?” 

“Like a rock or however you would like to remember it” answering with a wink because after all, they did find a pinch of ganja on me. 

“Where are you from?” 

“SLC UTAH home of the Mormons” 

“Oh yeah, you Mormon?” 

“Hell ya, born and raised! Aren't we all, did you not hear, SLC UTAH? I am a good little girl, I was a Boy Scout leader, a Sunday School teacher, I am a very obedient girl remember... I gave my first born up for adoption, I am so obedient... oh but oh ya, I guess I'm not that obedient, I did have sex before marriage.” 

“How long you been on Maui?” 

“One year. Maui has received me well, God bless Maui, I have made it.” 

“Where do you work?"

“West Maui Parasail” 

“What do you do there?” 
 
“I'm booth girl; I get them loaded, so they can get high, all day long, interesting enough.” 

“Oh ya, is that the one with the smiley face?” 

“That it is, you know, the one that has the awesome shirts that say, 'I got high on Maui'”.  They were brought to silence with my ever so truthful innocent answers. 

“What brought you here?” 

“Well, remember, that baby I lost, well that baby found us in 2006 and it’s not what they promise it’s not anything you expect... husband had a harder time with it than I... husband started medicating with prescribed pills on top of his occasional drinking that escalated to Heroin... I had to flea with my children from the man I had been married to for 23 years.” 

Now for those trick questions: 

Question one... “Have you ever been suicidal?” 

“Well, hasn't everyone” 

“Have you ever followed through with an attempt to kill yourself?” 

“Hasn't everyone willed it with their thoughts on many occasions, wishing life would be over soon because life does suck on many occasions?” 

Stumped but sweet local boy Rodney continues with the questioning “Has anyone in your family ever contemplated suicide?” 

“Well, doesn't everyone have someone in their family that has contemplated suicide?” 

Stumped with my every answer gazing deeper into my eyes with my every next question, Rodney continues... “Are you under a doctor’s care” 
 
“No” 

“Are you taking any meds?” 

“Absolutely not, I don't believe in prescription drugs, pills kill.” 

“Have you been in counseling or professional mental help?” 

“Of course, remember, I lost my first born to adoption, Post Traumatic Syndrome... no brainer” 

“Well, are you still under mental care?” 

“No, I would like to think I have graduated.” 

“Graduated, how do you mean, graduated from where.” 

“Graduated from others being my healer, and me being my own healer, helping others heal themselves... how do you think I have been able to handle this whole day of violation, probing and groping so well. I am very grateful, I am clear and good with myself because I can only imagine the trauma this day could have inflicted on my soul if I had not been clear... have you not witnessed my calm, my cool, my being able to share with such solid truthfulness without any triggers of upset?” 

After passing the exam, I inform them, “You may want to change your questions... I bet everyone that is asked those questions truthfully would answer the same, universally including all you men in uniform... I don't know what you are digging for but you may want to get clearer on what you are looking for and ask better questions to find what you really want to know.” 

Time for pictures and fingerprints... Officer K let Rodney know that he didn't feel a need for Rodney to search and grope again because I have already had that done by that female officer. 

Rodney takes my cuff off that has me attached to the chair and gently walks me through the rolling of the fingers and palms to get the prints scanned on the computer. I gratefully acknowledge his kindness while he is cradling my hands and state, “Thank you for being so kind and gentle, I would have much rather had you do the search and groping, that other lady was a bit rough creating fear in my space that she was going to go for a cavity search right there at Walmart.” 

I was informed that I am going to need to have someone come and bail me out for $100 because I don't have cash on me. They ask if I know someone that can come get me. I ponder with much thought speaking out loud as I am known for doing, stating, “Well, my sister is at work, my son is watching the children and my boyz are at work... do I only get one phone call?”

Officer K answers “I'm sure Rodney will allow a few if you make it quick, you have 5 minutes to finalize details of who is coming. Is there anything more that you need?” 

“May I have some water?” 

He handed me a pixie cup and pointed to the sink. 

I pulled a disappointed face and asked if I could just take a sip off of my water bottle please. And he proceeded to inform me that the plastic in the bottle is worse for me than the water from the pipes. Which I then proceeded to inform him that I will take my risks from the bottle because I am very protective of my pineal gland; confusing these men over the top by now, Sarge asks, “What?” 

I continue to inform these men that I recognized their softer acceptance of right brain thinking but that Officer K PYLAND is very left brained and should stick to bottled water. 

Well, that got Officer K wondering and he asked, “What do you mean left brain?” 

“Lacking in spirituality, lacking in creative thinking, lacking in love energy not trusting your heart, being a robot to the man and logic not trusting intuition or the higher power/source that we all have from within... God bless you, I wish you the best, I pray that this day has been divine for such a left brain to run into such a right brain... God bless you” 

Feeling and recognizing Officer K's throat Chakra knotting up, he says, “I am finished with you.” 

“I am so glad you are, I have not enjoyed you much at all, good day.” 

I call my sister and God bless Pati, she drops everything and drives straight to me. 

I get off the phone and Rodney asks, “So you have a sister here?” 
 
“Yes but she is the husband's sister... When I was back home, I had financial abundance and was the stay at home mom that helped everyone nurture and raise their children... a side effect from losing my firstborn, I am quick to see a mother in need and help raise all children... Pati is the youngest of their family of 8 siblings with Steve being 2nd to the eldest... when I had to flea upon husband getting addicted to heroin, I told my dear sister, 'Once a sister, always a sister, you will always be welcome in my home no matter where I live, I will continue to be here for you and your children ever and always'... Well Pati contacted me two weeks after arriving asking if my offer was genuine because she has no money and has four mouths to feed... I answered her, yes dear sister, together we are stronger and my dear sister has joined me on this journey ever since... it makes for a great story... I have written four books about it. Because I get it, my father is an adoptee, I am an adoptee, I am a mother of loss, and I also am a bonus mother to many that I nurture and love without having to have any ownership papers, I get it... thank you Maui... it’s called Hanai” 

Rodney being very moved, sensing he is connecting in more ways than one but holding back with a bit of a wrinkled chin, clears his throat and asks, “So is this going to be in the book?” 

With that I chuckle and say, “Indeed it is dear Rodney. I thought I was finished but I am now realizing, I have not written my final statements... and this definitely makes for a great final statement.” 

Sarge and the boyz continue with booking this delicate fairy princess, realizing I have such a beautiful pendant that I unfortunately will have to remove. Sarge takes a better look and asks looking into my eyes while holding my pendant in his hand, “What is this? It is beautiful, I'm sorry but we are going to have to cut it off your neck” 

Holding his gaze, I reply, “Rose quarts for my heart chakra, and Peridot, a stone that heals the healer...” 

I loved the unanimous silent aha's and admiration Sarge and the boyz let slip out. They all were so cute; I stood with no fear and absolute vulnerability while these four men took turns gently working on how to remove my crystal pendant that is tied to my neck with Hemp string. They finally resorted to cutting it off with scissors… none of them could successfully undo the knot, and believe me, they all gave it a gentle try. 

Sarge then asks, “Do you have under wire in your bra?"

At this point, I am inches away from all four men in blue, real comfortable with myself and them in my space as if they are my brothers, (which is what we all are to one another)... I look into Sarge's eyes, while I am reaching around my back to slip off my bra right there in front of them, “Are you serious? I am so glad for bottled water and my pineal gland is clear because rarely do I wear a bando over my bra... “ 

When Sarge and the boyz realize that I am stripping right then and there, Rodney and Sarge say, “No no not right here, are you sure you have the under wire?” 

“But of course, I have no boobs and utilize all of the Victoria Secret tools” 

After waving the wand around me and gently touching me here and there for a light search, I turn to face them once more, pleasantly comfortably informing Sarge and the boyz before entering my cage, “Ya know, this has been quite an interesting day, I have to say, this experience, especially right here and now has mirrored so many things to me... even currently right now what happens when one gets ordained to enter the temple, they touch you here and there having garments removed... thank you for the experience, I was never accepted into the LDS temple... which I do not mind a bit.... do I get a cage by myself or will I share with other inmates... which, never mind, you know what, it doesn't matter, I will go where you want me to go, I will enjoy the journey and welcome all that is meant to be in my space to hear what I offer to say.”

And with that, Sarge says, “Put her in cell three, by herself.” 

I was given a blanket and I made the best of it. I folded the mattress and made a great sitting chair for meditating. After a good 20 minutes of chuckling to myself of WTF, I am a fucking Rockstar, bring it... I own my truth, I am who I am, and I am solid with who I am. With that, I affirmed within, never again, will I be ashamed of who I am and behave differently to accommodate others. 

I easily, happily go into my meditation to be woken by Rodney repeating, “Ms. Stone.... Ms. Stone your sister is here.” 

Sarge and the boyz had changed their mind about me needing bail and informed me that I am free to go no charge but I must attend court for the violations.

What a trip, who knows what is to come of this, but I have a pretty good idea. After my sister and I get a bite to eat and she takes me to my car, I head straight to Paia, High Times, I need to replace my hide a toke that has been confiscated. 

AND p.s. I ordered MADONNA MDNA via internet, it will be here on Wednesday!